a search helicopter?!
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
found my necklace. it was safe with all 6 boxes of peeps that i bought that night.
I have not carelessly put myself in herpes way since I got a clean bill of health tyvm.
I feel like passing out with my foot on your face has bonded us at a very fundamental level.
I have better things to do with my life than be faithful.
I'd cum for enchiladas.
I can't name a single part of my body that isn't sore. Who says break up sex is bad sex?
Brett got me a cake with a pic of me shitting
That's how all the girlfriends are. Oh he's a boy, no worries, then BAM. I blow their boyfriend.
Should I take a fireball shot or brush my teeth?
I spent last night dying strippers pubes green and landscaping shamrocks. That is why hands look like I squashed a leprechaun.
I just used a box o wine to refill a bottle o wine to more effectively drunk clean
I PUT IT IN THE UNIVERSE THAT I WANTED TO STAB HIM AND THEN SOMEONE DID! KARMA IS A BITCH AND SHE IS BEAUTIFUL!
Your cat ate my taco.
. . . I don't have a cat?
It was laying in your bed. Now it's hunting for more tacos.
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