State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
Pretty sure the nurse said at one point I was in full restraints because I tried surfing my stretcher
Haha he was not a poor little guy. If he'd talked to me or something I might feel bad. But since I saw him groping other girls as well as myself there's no sympathy coming from me
He's just picking out the right girl. I do the same thing with fruit. Grope them, squeeze them, smell them. I have to know I'm getting quality fruit.
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
I would like to request a high five for getting laid while wearing crocs and a crab hat.
A conundrum I think only you would understand: how to classily post "I need a ride to the liquor store" on one's Facebook wall?
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
I'm bored enough im considering taking up his offer to turn me straight just to kill time until the lasagna is out of the oven
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
How drunk is too drunk to be on an airplane?
Is there a single word to describe 'the last guy she slept with before meeting her husband'? Cause there should be.
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
I tried to fuck you in my bathroom while my parents were in the next room. I am a clusterfuck of fun.
FIVE TIMES AND I HAVENT GOTTEN OFF ONCE
literally yelled NOOOO right before he finished .. yelled “five times and I still haven’t gotten off” when he was still inside me ..
Said “don’t worry I’ll get myself off tomorrow” to top it all off
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