i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
something came early last nite... and lemme tell u it wasn't christmas...
I am more sore today than I was after my car wreck. Take it as a compliment that you bang harder than a semi-truck.
He kept spanking me and talking about biomedical science.
Aw, you fucked a pre-med? you're moving up in the world!
I told him I'd rather have sex with his father last night. I'll admit now that I was drunk.
Go to petsmart and tell me if the dog trainer is the guy I slept with friday. Thanks.
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
Seriously I just dipped a banana in vodka I really need to stop drinking
I don't know which is worse, the fact that he can say will you fuck me in so many languages or that I'm turned on because of that
Hey ask him if he likes swappy seconds
You lit a fire in my vagina no man can extinguish.
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
I'm pretty sure that the bartender arranged a marriage for me last night. Sounds like a legit birthday present to me.
I woke up beside him and almost cried. Then I realized you were on the other side so I knew I hadn't made any bad decisions.
your mission the party friday: cockblock me at ALL costs. I've cheated on my boyfriend twice. I feel like three times would be crossing some sort of line...
and no, I don't care how how hot he is
Randomize
