have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
the coke olympics were a bad idea. there's a tree uprooted in the front of my building.
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
my car smells like vomit and bananas. this can't really be my life.
Yeah. she rolled up to the party on a unicycle then peed in the bushes. TA of the year.
remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..
Well then sir I'll probably see you tomorrow after my class and at 3 with your clothes off. Sounds like a solid way to start the weekend to me
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
Idk who invented dominoes cheese steak pizza but I wanna lick their balls
Nothing ends a night of heavy drinking better than banging to three six mafia in your own driveway
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
I swear to god he's making pineapple onions and cheese. He thinks he's making eggs onions and cheese
I'm full of champagne and rage, of course I'm showing up at his house.
Nobody on Tinder wants to give you a Blumpkin.
Randomize