let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
I may or may not have slept in someones apt on your street because they told me I was fun sized like a mini snickers
we tried to steer you away from them but you just kept yelling 'i need dick' and going back. sorry.
I was fucking the girl and her best friend walked in on us. She said we looked thirsty, got us a glass of water, and poured it down both of our throats. It was like... sex bottle service
Somebody left a mini pitcher in the bathroom. Think its safe?
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
True life. I have to get a nose job due to a deviated septum from blowing coke. Thank you college.
YOU DID DRUGS AFTER A THREESOME WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE ME?!!?
Our room will be decorated with my urine.
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
Company meeting and there he was. Felt a little weird like 'last night you were telling me how your dick loves me, and now we're listening to a report on sales figures'.
I got all the way to work before I realized there were Trojans in my bra.
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
He's throwing Skittles into my cleavage and some are rebounding into my crouch.
Well he's scoring either way then.
I just shaved my legs via the sink as to not wake my parents up because I know I'll be having marathon sex tomorrow after my certification exam... so this is life after college.
Randomize
