We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
Just because it's been in my vagina doesn't mean it's important to me
just got carried INTO the bar by 4 people. it's like watching my weekend in reverse.
He explained how that handle got into our fridge. I think i'm going to stick with my original assumption that the vodka gods want me to drink more vodka.
Oh god, so much rum. I think I was in a shotgun wedding with a Bacardi promotion girl.
I just threw up over a bridge. I didn't even know there was a bridge in this town. Vodka is like a transportation device.
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
I hope our bodies realize that workaholics starts tomorrow and will be well enough to handle the hell we are going to put them through. amen.
dude you literally had like 30 screwdrivers, i thought you were gonna die
that explains why my vomit smells like it came from florida
The Australian strangers convinced me to leave him behind when they started chanting Aussie Aussie Aussie, Oy Oy Oy, and told me they had a bunch of beer at their place.
I asked you for a cigarette and you handed me your phone and told me to search for one
I might run out into oncoming traffic. Id rather break my legs and/or die then continue with today.
I'm ordering dildos in a santa hat. You?
Omg there's puke under my pillow. Clearly I puked and tried to hide it. From myself. \n
I’m sorry, some of us common-folk don’t have access to steady dick
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