Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
her idea of "friends with benefits" is her doing my laundry. i'm cool with it.
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
Why is everyone in the bowling alley looking at me like i'm a prostitute just because I have bunny ears on?
im eating mac and cheese with a makeup brush. there is wayyyyy too much wrong with this night.
I think I'll handle my grief by throwing myself headlong into lesbianism. Seems like a fitting tribute to you.
In your drunken glory you promised me, tongue, 12 naked pics, and 1,800 breakfasts.
Who gives a hand job to a 19 yr old one night then the next lets a 31 year old random man fly a plane to town and pick u up and take u to dinner?
We found Mulan.
I thought you were in bed what the hell
Be my booze princess bebe. I'll rescue you from the lame tidings you are confined to up in the sober castle.
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
I wish so many great beards were not attached to even greater jerks. All that face sitting potential wasted. Some of the greatest tragedies of this century.
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
I'll keep supplying drugs if you teach me piano.
Randomize
