He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
I did a mental Irish jig when he pulled out the second condom.
I am like the Mr. Miyagi of queefs.
Something strange is happening to me, I think I miss hooking up with girls sober
I fell asleep to him stroking my ass calling it his precious.
All I know is that I'm not gonna send out SOS messages via twitter for your rescue this time.
"willing to pay anyone fun whos willing to hang out and laugh at my jokes while my friends are MIA" is this to desperate?
You were peeing on a bus yelling fuck public transit, congratulations.
im In safeway buying a bottle of Ciroc in short shorts at 3:00 pm on a Monday, yeah I don't know either.
the good news is that even if it's Alex's, I can still say it's Colin's, because the kid will come out ginger anyway!
who knew there'd be a plus side to your ginger fetish one day?
Things could not have gone more poorly if I had stripped naked and run through the Sahara with sirloins tied to my vagina.
It's confirmed. I have two dates on Saturday, and they are both named Mike.
Its because she suspects I'm a frequent drug user, which I am, but I am going to make her feel like she is crazy for believing it.
That married penis I’ve been riding offered to pay off my student loans. I was going to break it off because he has lousy stamina. Is being debt free worth putting up with mediocre sex?
That bitch claimed that you said it was ok if she drank your vodka. Obviously she has never met you
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