did you get engaged???
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
I'm eating Doritos that I crushed up n put in a cup so I only have to chill minimally.
Wtf man. I knew she was bad news. No sane person cares if you eat their raviolli.
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
I just pictured ballsacks being shoveled into the furnace of the Titanic.
I wish my bank account would intervene on my life choices.. $200+ in alcohol in 2 weeks and a $40 McDonald's bill is a cry for help.
Literally if she wants to make a big deal, I'd rather have shit smeared on my face.
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
Is using cherry lube as jam shameful or hilarious
I kept on yelling at him to get his shit together as he was puking
The stall at this bar had mirrors all around. I just looked at myself take a shit from like 3 different angles
In the middle of pounding my asshole he stopped and said, "do you want to get breakfast after this?"
You were in the girls bathroom yelling at some random chick because you thought she stole all the urinals. That's why you were kicked out.
It's National Whipped Cream Day, prep those nips
Randomize
