well we can cross tagging a chick in a movie theatre off the list of things to do before we die
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
i've noticed that whenever i have to ask myself "would i be doing this if i was sober?" the answer is probably no.
My brain is officially off for summer until late august. If that guy wants to fuck me, he better do it soon.
Just made a makeshift menthol by rolling a listerine strip into a regular cigarette... Poor? Who, me?
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
you asked "if this appropriate to take the the bathroom?" while holding up a bottle of vodka when you went to pee.
He woke me up at 4am just to lick my nipple. Then he talked in his sleep for 20 minutes about the sex we just had. I think it's safe to say he's a weird one, but I dont care cuz he fucks like a champ.
I may or may not be taking a bath listening to the Phantom of the Opera. This lovely moment brought to you by xanax.
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
My manager said you offered to make out with him to ensure I keep my job if I didn't show up to work today
Unless he's under 18, in which case you put him back where you found him this instant.
Wait you took his virginity AND broke his bed doing it
I know! I’m the best!
Randomize
