Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
the fda needs to get their shit together cause these four loko going away parties are gonna kill me
I feel like if Miami and New Jersey fucked each other and produced a baby that would summarize the bar I'm in.
He's drinking 50/50 vodka/water out of a camelback. Disaster would be a compliment at this point.
We need a bunch of roses, some chocolate, 2 cops, a mariachi band, and a thermometer
Woke up to the UT campus police fishing my boxers out of the university pool, guess it was a good night.
I just talked this guy out of hooking up with me and gave him relationship advice. Am I a good person now?
You made me take a photo of you under the stairs at the bar. "Look I'm Harry Potter."
I was going to do a cardio thing but then tacos.
We've been staking out a taco bell for 2 hours trying to find last night's one night stand
Now go get drunk with your fam and get back into ur christmas groove. No time for gonnorhea
Our sex from this weekend should be engraved into a plaque or commemorated somehow. It was fucking amazing.
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
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