why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
Nights like last night are what makes cleaning up the vomit in the morning worth it
And then he asked the cop "shall i shut off the lady gaga?" as he was being frisked.
Let's just say for some reason we thought it was okay to make a burrito smoothie.
Aren't you glad we're at the point in our relationship where I don't even ask why you're hiding in the cabinet?
She had caution tape on her head and she blew me.
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
Dropping the entire last roll of TP into the toilet is a hurt you don't want to know.
I'm naked, I'm drunk, and I'm all up on social media right now
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊
we should most definitely have a fire extinguisher in the apartment. like... for sure
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
when part of the plan includes getting high, i usually forget how the rest of the plan goes.
I'm seriously scared right now. Woke up next to 3 geese and a lot of feathers ..
He gave his liver a pep talk before the vodka chugging started
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