I'm think I may have given your ex's number to a convicted sex offender.
Win!
He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
Yeaaah, so cabbie laughed at me, and said, "rough nite? Let me find you some music" . apparently OPP is the appropriate ride of shame soundtrack.
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
The beers last night were like the tears from god
She is banging on the liquor store door begging them to let her come in.
Were going to have to vacuum the bathtub, great party
I'm driving while wearing hulk hands
I threw up in a mitten on my drive home. Wow.
He snapchatted me his dick and he's circumcised....BRB going to hug his Mom
Had to immediately delete the Bevmo email because I can't even look at an email about alcohol right now.
I wish I could take a screenshot of how things literally look from my eyeballs right now
All I'm saying is that if he knows his wife walks around naked during the day, he shouldn't bring a friend home for lunch and show up unannounced.
I don't know what's wrong with me. The guy from bar rescue is making me horny
Do him. As soon as possible and as often as possible. That's what Oprah would say
Randomize
