It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
So I just found out that my mom and dad arent married
What? They have three kids?
Yep. And apparently I have a half brother. Happy Birthday to me
You two were too busy to notice that his used condom landed on me when he threw it.. Thanks.
You passed out across the stairs with your feet and arms through the railings so you "wouldn't fall down when you blacked out and no one could get the pizza past you without waking you up". \n\nYou're the smartest drunk I know.
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
Apprently after I bit that bouncer, it all went down hill.
I just wanna be like "dude your gf's on a porn site" but i just dont know if i have the heart.
I was busy. But now I'm about to consume alcohol and chicken. We shall see where this takes us. Maybe to the moon, maybe to the floor. I have no idea.
You were convinced you would hurt my car if you opened the door. Then you barfed in the pretzle bucket Peter gave you
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
In my defense, I haven't stolen anyone's clothes yet.
Yeah, that's a plus.
Just tried to dig out holes in my mattress for my boobs so I could be comfortable lying down on my stomach
He called from a stranger phone to say. He was a t a liquior store and there was a long line they have no condoms. This is the guy i was gonna go on a date with
Atleast he is letting you know he will be late
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
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