Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
I blacked out, fell off a swingset, and thought I was Liz Lemon for almost an hour.
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
omg i met someone at the bar who sells hair feathers. that are long. saved in my phone as "haiirs deather"
Hung over does not do it justice. I am hung like a horse over. I am hungover and over and over. I am hung, drawn and quartered fucking over. They just told me I can't keep my sunglasses on in the office. Fuck drinking with you people.
We were eating hotdog buns dipped in French onion dip in lawn chairs at 4am. That drunk
passed out in the hallway last night, now I'm sitting down in the shower, eating lukewarm canned soup out of Tupperware, listening to Carly rae jepsen.. I had a rough night.
In other news, last night I told somebody they made eczema look so good they should call it sexzema.
I found a video on my phone from last night... You got up on the table at McDonald's and screamed BURRITOOO!
I just smoked weed with my physics professor. Tell me how my life is this.
He told me that he's proud of our abnormalcy as a couple. I think it's the most romantic thing he's ever said.
I have got to stop telling people I was almost a prositute every time I drink
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
Randomize
