it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
There are Star Wars cutouts in his basement. Obi Wan Kenobe watched me give him a handjob.
I'm on my fifth double. This night is getting better whether it likes it or not.
He offered me a ride home but i walked. He lives by an elementary school so a 10 yr old safety officer helped me across the street during my walk of shame
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
I feel like telling him your vigina was older than him was not a good pick up line.
Who am I sleeping next to in your bed? Where are you? Also when are you coming home... I need coffee.
Copy that. Decided to shower with a beer in a glass bottle. Gotta stop the bleeding first. Be there is 20
Right now, I'm sitting in my room, drinking beer, eating double stuff Oreos, taking bites straight from a block of cheese, and watching Anchor Man 2 trailers. Finals week at its finest
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
Yes dating, but it seems easier to just live in a perpetual state of Netflix, internet porn, and cheese.
Yeah bc that's when u should take a Molly. At a house party with everyone from ur hometown
I woke up with a treasure map drawn on my ass. Whattt.
Randomize
