That's your penis' name. I've always referred to it as Alejandro secretly.
I hope my tampon is in his bed. That'll teach him. Happy new years btw
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
Hahahahahahhajahahahahajajjajahjahahajahahajajahahahajjajajahahjajajajajahahahajjjajajaahhahhahahahahahahahaha dominos taxi
I haven't seen her in ages, how is she?
Well I woke up next to her this morning so I guess I would say she could be doing better
There is a pile of hair outside the apartment next door. At least now I know what all that shouting was about last night.
I mean like if I stood up my head might pull me down like an anchor
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
I'd tell u there's strippers to make you get here faster, but that would be a blatant lie... There's strippers here.
I wanna fuck that hideous moustache right off your face. get the confetti ready for the festivities
There is a man playing a trumpet at this brunch and I hate life. Too hungover for this. Send help ASAP.
You used a fucking bud light like as lube last night. I'd get a UTI test like stat.
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
Tequila. The ruiner of all good intentions.
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
Randomize
