My mom is making me buy a single zucchini, I look like someone who can't afford a dildo
Don't blame the cocaine for your eating disorder.
Can't a girl send out a 4 pm booty call anymore
I know I should be focused on nurturing their bright little minds but it's 10 a.m. and I need a cock in my mouth
Did you guys have sex yet? And don't worry, I broke the ice already by sending this to both of you. So you can just jump right into it. You're welcome.
On a lighter note, my mom and I were playing scattergories, and for "things that you keep hidden" we both put dildo. Proof that we really are related.
He stopped replying so I told him I got tested and it came back positive for chlamydia to see if he replied. His phone magically works again!
Please tell me joes at work safe and sound and doesn't smell like jail?
I dealt with the imported moonshine, but when the cocaine came out, I had to get the fuck out of there
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
I tried to light my cup as a bong. I'm done drinking
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
He was really cute! And I know but it's just like getting my fix ya know? He's basically a human vibrator.
Do you wanna fuck while my apple pie is in the oven?
Randomize
