That's intense
girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
so this guy on craigslist is offering a case of beer to shave his back. i think i'm gonna take him up on it.
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
Ive been home for 20 minutes and I'm already in bed with a vodka tonic
There is no way I'm taking advice from somone who's idea of a balanced diet consists of vodka and lemon detox juice
the guy in the stall next to me, came in, farted, laughed, and proceeded to give himself some sort of hillbilly pep talk that included the phrase "big pussy".
She tried to escape and she fell and hit the door. She's gunna freak when she wakes up with only half a tooth.
But you have work tomorrow. And a whore to pick up. And a dinner to eat. And a vagina to slaughter. Your day is full!
I appreciate the concept of vaginal slaughtering.
She started crying and told me to leave half way through, I'm walking down main with a bottle of patron and a sweatpants boner.
this better not be you asking for a beej
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
Yeah then you killed that bottle of Bacardi in under 20 minutes. So much for being an organ donor.
Can you get winded from lip syncing? I don't know how Britney does it
If I'm able to walk tomorrow morning, I'm gonna be really disappointed with myself...
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