i was unaware that anal sex sometimes ends with shit on the bed.
For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
Oh and then this old man who saw it happen goes "don't do that"
Hahaha what a helpful old man. Like you thought it was normal to be spilling gas everywhere.
Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
Writing apology letters and leaving them on peoples doors for your actions is NOT what I want to be doing at 6am.
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
Apparently I got mad at you for "Not drinking with me till we thought we were seahorses" and smashed my face on your door. Then I put my feet in the oven and started crying because I was drinking alcohol from a pot. My life is spinning out of control.
I think they were making kool-aid in my bed. There is lots of sugar and my hands and face are stained blue.
Somebody really needs to come home and pick up the used condom from the middle of the wood room floor. It's blue, if that helps decide who comes - uh, home.
Watching Faye Reagan porn all weekend for St Patty's day. Nothing has ever seemed more appropriate.
While I appreciate the pity sex (seriously, THANK YOU) we should not do it 3feet away from my ex when he's passed out next time. Awkward.
You got drunk, made toast, and declared yourself a domestic goddess.
I called him my big strong man today. It's all downhill from here. Matching Christmas sweaters, here we come
Randomize
