Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
Told a girl i wanted to feel her bellybutton from the inside... I need to learn how to flirt
I looked up to you, until I saw her walk out of your room.
Waaait I'm alsleep in myt car somewhere
he told me he saved a turtle in the middle of the road.. i told him id be over in ten minutes...i mean he deserves a bj after that.
Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation.
Apparently we were arguing for captain seats so I shouted "who has your virginity." I got the seat.
Hypothetically going to the gym on coke was a good idea
As far as drugs go, alcohol has all the elegance and precision of hitting yourself in the head with a hammer.
He left my apartment when I broke up with him just as my booty call was walking in. It was a little awkward...
Mainly I just wanna pet bunnies. And purple chicks. Well any color chicks if I close my eyes. But purple if I open them.
So apparently when I'm drunk and want water I pant like a dog and expect to have water given to me..
The doctor basically called me a dirty dick.
The last time I went out with these guys I won an iced tea maker from a drag queen.
Randomize
