btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
come over i need a lifeguard for my shower
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
If only we could all 3 say fuck school to be stoner flight attendants
The more and more I drink I keep rationalizing banging eye patch girl
the cops were hovering over him then shinned a flashlight to the floor above ours, then I realized that some fucker jumped from the third story.
fuck our hall.
Please stop hiding condoms in my house. If I want to have sex with you, I will let you know. FYI, my mom found the ones hidden behind the milk. She was not happy.
it's like I can see my whorish nature reflected back at me in his wedding ring.
Only Jon could get an entire commuter train to chant "Ride! Jon! Home!" to get a girl in bed.
I just had the stunning realization that I lost my virginity in a bunk bed.
If I could sit on this toilet forever I would totally do that right now
I don't know about this Sanders guy after all. I'm voting for MYSTERY BABYLON, WHORE OF ALL THE EARTH
Hillary?
I'm a lady who knows what she wants in life, and that's uncommitted dick.
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
Bro, that'd be the third dick I've taken down in the office.
Randomize
