I'm torn. Shes everything I ever wanted, but I just cant get past the story about having drunken sex with her dog in high school.
I would pay so much money for a video of you fucking a sheep
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
At this point do you think buying mom a pot plant would be funny or highly inappropriate?
Divorce is final. Doing tequila shots at 1 in the afternoon.
So my mom and I were talking about what I should get you for christmas. She made it clear I cannot get christmas lingerie.
oh dear god, that would be like watching to female walruses mate. We need to stop going to that lesbian bar...
I sent him a pic of my tits and he said "Word." I need a drink.
some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
he sent me a green and gold dick pic and advised me I needed to come drive the snake from Ireland.
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
im tired of guys just wanting to hook up with me. im like, guys, i know im pretty and i have a slammin bod and i love making out, but cant someone treat me with respect??
Slowly dying because of my period and my phone is mocking me because I have 69% battery
Randomize
