I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
You're the host. Of course you wear the diaper. It's like wearing the pants.
hows that letter of apology to the waitress at waffle house coming?
Why am I getting the stink eye from these people? They're acting like BYOB isn't kosher in a laundromat.
please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
No one figured out why I brought along the vibrating massager.
He told me i had to sleep under his bed. He said it would be my castle.
Pretty sure I just heard the turkey yell "don't put me in there" as it was going in the oven. way too high for this holiday.
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
Nothing is worse than post drunken playoff baseball loss sex
I don't know how or when he is sober long enough to donate plasma
We're both clumsy. What does this imply for our kids?
Helmets.
I need to pull it together. I just cried my eyes out to Master Chef Junior.
New rule: if you don't think racism exists, you don't get to put your penis inside me.
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
Randomize
