i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
Just bored and untired. I want to be in Austin. At college. Drinking someone elses alcohol. Am I asking too much of life?
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
They're doing shots to celebrate every 15 minutes passing. You can come get them.
Bartender just fed me brownie. Its going to be a good night
This is ridiculous. I’m in fucking college getting high off a potato.
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
I was taking this cougar home in the middle of the night I walked across the hall all naked to take a piss and ran into to some chick from highschool she said no way you are fucking my mom ran into her moms room and started yelling at her
I was taking a nap and she comes in wo/ pants, gets up on the bed and mounts my face while watching Weeds on Netflix. I'm okay with it, but at least let me wake up first.
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
Other than the whole stab wound in my leg thing, today was pretty good. The nurses all loved me and gave me a sandwich and juice.
we had to take 10 shots sometime before midnight, then 11 shots between midnight and 1. so yes its gonna be a rough day.
Randomize
