Haha no. But I cannot hook up with you anymore. Especially when you group text people.
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
I didn't mean to leave you there I just didn't know him well enough to throw up in his bathroom.
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
My grandmother cheats at beer pong and has been rubbing her tainted victory in my face for an hour now.
Got paid to make out with a girl. It takes skill to be this drunk and still make money
I was about to attempt a citizen's arrest on my RA
I forgot how weird my hair bleaches and now I'm a calico
You can wake up to my rainbow of failure
So I had sex with a hook nosed, lisping masadonian last night.
Glad that degree in literature is paying off. Nice adjectives. Maybe set the bar a little higher though?
We were having sex and my nose just started pouring blood. He reached down to the floor, grabbed a sock and held it to my nose. He just kept pounding away like nothing was happening.
Is this a Beer, Vodka or Whiskey kind of problem solving night? It's imperative I stock accordingly.
Questions like that are why I love you.
In other news, Justin Bieber has a big dick and that makes me uncomfortable.
I'm fine w planning around your penis prospecting. Saturday it is.
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
Randomize