Last night I broke through a door, was hospitialized, arrested, and threw my shoe at a bouncer. This summer is gonna be fuckin sick.
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
i don't know how the hand towel got involved, but i peed all over it
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
i'm drinking whiskey out of a ziplock bag in a movie theater. i'm THAT girl.
I probably looked like a mental patient. I had my IV in one hand and cup of pee in the other, swaying around with a dazed grin on my face. I love vicodin.
I'm just a little drunk right now and I have to work at 3
Omg sara
I ran out of milk and it's hot and I was thirsty
i vomited out of my nose in three different houses so far, i will be back for my boots tomorrow
I told him to pick up the beer can he threw in front of the police station. So he gets out chugs whatever's left and throws it back and says ok let's go.
I fell off my bed and busted open my chin on the prisoner of azkaban. Somehow missed the almost empty Jose handle next to it. So guess what I was doing last night?
I'm on my way back with the wine... And a puppy. It was free.
Just participated in the saddest thing: Cheetos. Handjob. I have lost at life
I would just like to say that I had morning sex today to the Hamilton soundtrack. So.
When he busted out the ketchup I got the hell out of there. It got really creepy really fast.
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