Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
it was really awkward. it took him like like 2 minutes to realize who he was jacking off to. he stopped mid-stroke. such a small small world
i told you not to try chat roulette
He was pretty out of it. He heard crickets outside, and thought it was the laptop. So he put his ear to it, rubbed the keyboard, and said "tell me your secrets."
Can you explain to me how i got kicked out of a bar last night, from outside the bar?
Nothing like puking into an empty cooler at a red light on the way to get plan b.
No need to call an exterminator, the ants overdosed on the leftover lines on the counter.
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
Sorry about flashing you in front of your mom.
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
HELP! I GOT DRUNK IN THE LIVING ROOM AND CANT GET UP UPSTAIRS
Just got the test results back; apparently I'm red-green colorblind. this explains the past 18 years of my life and i'm wondering why i didn't realize this sooner
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
Holy fuck, my entire boob is bruised! Lierally my boob is just one big bruise.
You know my vagina and my heart have a mind of their own even when it’s pouring snow.
Why did I wake up next to the fire pit? And who wrapped me up like a burrito?
Jägerbombs. Thank Sara.
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