Booty call?
Dude you don't even follow my twitter
did we hook up?
no, because you kept repeating "itty bitty titties" when i took off my shirt
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
Revised rule: don't put your dick in the general vacinity of mental instability.
Not even dry humping. Not even a little bit.
she's five days sober.....are those consecutive????
5 days not 5 nights... like a bad hotel/vacation deal
Eye surgery went well. Just can't believe it took getting lasers through my eyes to temporarily stop the vivid sex dreams I was having
I apologize for tapping your ass. It was a friendly tap. Like Casper. Ya know
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
Let's just says his mouth writes a lot of checks that his penis just can't cash. Don't waste your time.
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
Didn't you used to babysit him?
18 years ago I helped him into his clothes. Today he helped me out of mine.
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
So I had Xanax for breakfast & I'm probably going to fuck my tennis instructor.
I ended up sleeping with him in a public bathroom because neither of us remembered where we lived. I have hit a new low.
Randomize
