bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
i just ran into our bio chem professor at the bar. apparently, he doesn't follow the "no slapping your students' asses" rule.
A horse told me not to drive home last night. I think there was a cop on top of it.
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
He walked into the party with a case on one shoulder and a boom box on the other of course I fucked him
how was ur day?
this is strictly sexting don't make small talk.
Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it.
The EMT told me when I left the ER "I'd like to take off your pants again and inspect your package. Just not during a medical emergency..." We're hooking up tonight.
Points for getting a hot hook up after getting a shard of glass in your thigh. Almost makes it worth it.
I gave them the 'I used to fuck your son' discount.
Moral of the story: always keep condoms in your bra
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
How do u ask ur friend if shes keeping her kid but in a chill way
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
Nah, we’re just sitting around talking about different kinds of boners
like, there were so many other better not terrible choices you could have made, so i'm honestly baffled that you managed to fuck up that bad
Randomize
