Just ducktaped my beer to my bike. See you in ten.
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
a kid who worked there came up to me and let me know you were sitting in the bathroom sink. he said it was fine, so i just kept checking on you.
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
For the record you were pretending you were in a rocket when you drove from wawa to your house. So like 2 minutes of me listening to you making rocket sounds over the phone lmfao
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
Would it be playing god to put spaghetti on my pizza?
this is an emotional support booty call
all of these bad things happened because I didn't bring a shower beer.
No I kepy moaning and just called out a name to make them believe I was actually having sex instead of masturbating.
She woke up with her hand super glued to the fridge....how the hell am I Supposed to get her off??
I know right? It's like he knows how to pleasure me better than I do myself... He's like a prophet of sex
I woke up with a pillow, shampoo and a plant in my fridge. Eggs in the toilet, and I was wearing three pairs of girls underwear. What happened last night
might I remind you I fucked a 21 year old and almost did coke with strangers? you definitely came out on top
Randomize
