the new term for farting is butt boxing.
there's a taquito in the driveway. If it's not yours I'm going to eat it.
You peed in the parking lot while a car was was waiting behind us. And when people walked by you proceeded to say "careful you might slip"
Woke up this morning with a junior police officer sticker over my nipple this morning.
Even when you're not here I still manage to get pad thai in my vagina
I can't even go pee because I'm making sure he doesn't run off somewhere naked.
My only regret is not throwing up on the conveyor belt in the dining hall
I think my hookup is starting to fall for me. Time to break his heart.
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
dollar rum and cokes, see you on the dark side of infinity
Woke up with a grilled cheese in my hand, it was like god giving me a high five for the night before
Today has been hell. Also I saw a dead man's penis. It's safe to say I will be getting very drunk tonight.
I'm peeing on your house...you up?
Do you remember telling those ppl that they need to mate and give you the baby and in 15 years you will all reunite and it will be a party?
Randomize
