Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
Why does it say "go to Planned Parenthood tomorrow" on my dry-erase board?
T-minus about 54 seconds until I am too high to speak English.
I'm jealous
My throat feels like a candle.
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
he calls his bong barack obonga, commander in kief. i found where i belong.
its sad that I know 23 beers will fit into my purse
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
Some old bald man is a 100,000 dollar Audi sports car just revved his engine at me and held out his phone at me trying to get my number. I hate the valley.
Now we're discussing the sex we had and the later lack thereof. It's like marriage counseling via snapchat.
Some dude peed on tonys floor because drunkness
They offered him a bucket as he was peeing and he was like "Nah, I'm good"
Trying not to ruin Mother's Day with the enormous hickey on my neck. Nice.
Yeeah, I think a threesome is one of those wedding presents you can't register for at Bed Bath And Beyond..
She got up, grabbed me a box of gushers told me to start eating, and immediately gave me the best head I've ever gotten.
I accidentally told my mom I broke my drug nail this weekend
I just group texted a dick pic. Wonder who'll respond back first. Ashley Stacey or my stepmom
Randomize
