Mr ***** is in bed with his super hot wife giving her 18 inches of pleasure
My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
alone in the kitchen at 4 am eating a hotdog.
I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
Tried to buy Xanax from my boss last night. Wrong Mike.
The only person who has seen my penis more than that girl, is that girl's sister.
Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
That would be a dream come true. Seriously, he's like my mount everest, my life's ambition is to climb him.
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
Within the hour, he sent me 8 texts and 4 voice memos. One of the memos was just him whistling for 3 minutes. ...It's official, I attract the crazies.
Not as great as when your drunk mom grabbed my junk, but better than when your sober grandma sacktapped me and grabbed my butt.
Need a Dr's note to excuse me from blowjobs for 3-6 weeks while my jaw heals..
What can I say, I just want your vagina in my mouth.
Randomize
