She was drunk and kept trying to talk while I was in her mouth. It sounded like the teacher from a Charlie Brown cartoon!
Lets go to the mall and pick up some fat chicks and take them out tonight so we can be the skinny friends
I'm like a rollypolly, I only open my legs up when I feel safe.
we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees
Zach says you can't see his penis until after we're married...not sure why?! Bt then he said he thinks maybe you already have on the wild animal night!
The bouncer asked you what your sign was and u replied "syracuse"
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
note to self: an IV pole is no substitute for a stripper pole. Written it on my ankle cast.
Dude. He put me on a rewards point system for his dick. I have to do him favors now to build up to winning sex. This is shit.
Blacked out, Had to be carried out of the bar again by two large black bouncers. Asked them to be my "boo thangz" Again.
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
What is their policy on bow ties and belligerence?
i may have given a gay guy with a mohawk my number last night that said... "you are straight" omg so glad a whole year til my next birthday... also i hit myself in the face with a car door. nice.
My ex came over to hook up...then I went on a date 2 hours later and got a bj. Single: Finally doing it right.
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
Randomize
