we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
The hot Japanese girl in my class just said her "favorite sexy American actor is Nick Cage." That, I can work with.
You are the patron saint of my drinking problem.
told weddin planner we wanted to work in ceremonial body shots before vows. she hasnt reponded yet...
No seriously stop! I feel bad for him. It isn't even big enough to make fun of. It's so small that it's like a disability.
Every concussion has its silver lining
There's a very drunk Asian strawberry shortcake crying on the curb next to my truck. I'm not really sure what standard protocol is for this situation.
For the past year I have been the most responsible I have ever been in my entire life and now spring break is here and there is free penis just traipsing around my entire town. The game is afoot.
Dad stumbling and puking in the White Castle parking lot = Father's Day success
Are we on the same shift tomorrow and more importantly do you want your pants back?
Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me
Oh and apparently something happened that was related to "THIS IS SPARTA" but no one will tell me what I did.
So I'm going to blame my boobs hurting on that.
Really, who hasn't had sex on your bed?
ME.
Just met my French neighbor. We watched a crow die together, so we're pretty tight.
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
Randomize
