Shitting during a conference call is so empowering.
he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
U of I kids don't fist pump to Sweet Caroline. Get me the fuck out of here.
you kept falling over in mid-conversation and you just got right back up as if nothing happened...
Did your dad mention the fact that you asked him for viagra at 2 in the morning?
we have 69 mutual friends...i have to add her
Don't know how I even got in. I pulled my id out and threw it at the bouncer, and he just picked it up, checked it, and let me in.
Shoot me. I need tickles, a drink, sushi and a handy
Order is debatable
Yeah. He can't come because his mom found the pizza box under his bed with my underwear in it. He acted confused, guess because i forgot to tell him..
My reasons for going are selfish. She just opened her own law firm. I figure having a lawyer as a friend is a good idea. Nothing in my life suggests I won't need a lawyer again.
An old biker dude just flirted with me at Food City. I enjoyed it. God damn I need to get laid.
If it involves notarization or the Misfits, I am up to date. Anything else, I know fuck-all.
It is 5:00PM and I'm just now putting on underwear.
I don't remember what you did, but I DO remember that i'm supposed to hate you for it.
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
Randomize
