You saying I have a drinkingg problem is like saying Superman has a flying problem.
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
where did this taco bell managers name tag come from ?
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
Totally just met the chick getting nailed in our lobby last night. Should I bring it up?
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
I remember because you made a pirate noise when you came.
Dude, don't put me in a suit and feed me liquor; I'll never go home.
So like, boobs.
are you really going to start every conversation like that?
One minute we were ordering sandwhiches. The next hes peeing in a trash can yelling at kids about how tv made him this way
THEYRE FUCKING GOLD
Are you talking about the color of my tits or the quality of my nudes cause both are
She invited us over for cocaine and donuts
Terrible idea I love it
My life is a random series of events connected only by bottles of Seagram's 7
They want a bedroom just for their cats. And you thought we were gay.
Randomize