these 2 russian guys walked past me and i got freaked out because i thought call of duty got real
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
Found you in the bushes with fireworks, a teacup and no shoes. Decided it was a bad time to wake you.
I smell like Captain Morgan and tears
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
Oh I woke up in my neighbors garage using one of their sleeping bags, as my neighbor was doing laundry in there.
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
She told me my dick looked like a baby seal wrapped in a sleeping bag.
I just finished packing for spring break, took me 4 minutes. To be fair though I only put my trunks, a pair of underwear, and 50 condoms in my bag.
I also got a mission for you and you're gonna love it. Biggest. Hospital. Party. Ever.
i feel like when you brought up the possibility of you getting pregnant the sexting is over
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
I felt like I needed to shower with a Mr. Clean Magic Eraser.
Randomize
