member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
He showed up to fuck me at the same time the pizza guy did. It was like everything I needed just showed up at my stoop.
Just ordered an appetizer sampler to distract the fat chicks so we can escape
That dude you fucked three years ago just won Jeopardy
My nephew just told me I smell like apathy and regret. Thats the hangover I'm dealing with
Either I spilled whiskey on my boobs last night or they are fermenting. Not concerned in the slightest
you got coffee,laid,and a sandwich. that never happens when I work
! asked the random counter guy from 7/11 for Percocet. he immediately called his hookup
It is a bad day indeed when you learn that your boy toy looks better in your dresses than you do
You yell at me for giving you beer but not for licking spilled beer off your chest.
I'm 2 seconds away from smashing the bottle and drinking it off the counter with a straw.
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
Best single mom victory - getting eaten out in my dodge caravan in the hospital parkade at midnight.Three words: screaming multiple orgasms.
Randomize
