ill do whatever it takes for me to get more high and eat pie
She was indeed spoonfeeding you potato salad out of that giant bowl with a giant spoon. Dont feel special, she was giving it to everyone that left the bar.
If a video of someone that looks like me banging that chick on the hood of her car in some parking lot suddenly shows up on the web... let me know, I gotta see how that turned out.
I mean besides the fact someone got stabbed, I still had a pretty good night.
So I fucked her. If you're keeping score at home, it's all tied up with horrible sex with someone I like and great sex with someone I hate both with 1.
he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
all i remember was her shitting herself and asking me to call her parents.....i so didn't. when i woke up she was gone and left a note saying "we will be lovers forever"
I told a 250 pound football player I would catch him if he jumped into my arms. And that is how I broke my wrist
This is stupid. I am not getting knocked up from fucking in his backseat behind a starbucks. I refuse.
Tomorrow I need you to slap me in the face. I'll explain then
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
you bet i'm gonna rock his four-foot-two world.
Socially acceptable to sleep in a booth in the library? Its not finals but I dunno if I can make it back to south. Too drunk.
I am a unicorn in a field of flowers, you asshole.
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