I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
Listen, i'm watching playoff hockey and eating waffles. i just don't have time for your drama today.
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
he convinced the breakfast vendor to melt twix bars on bacon for me at 4am. he slurred every word. i think i found my prince charming.
He only talks to me during the summer and it's probably because I let him fuck me in my pool last year.
The hot guy sitting next to me in the lib is reading a book called "Impersonal sex in public places." How wrong would it be to give him my number when I bounce?
When this bachelor party is over and your life is in ruins, you have my permission to die.
Really? I thought your parents stopped loving you when you drunkenly fell through the ceiling...
Dude, I'm pretty sure I slept with my TA's girlfriend
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
Celebrated Veteran's Day by getting a Marine (who just got back from deployment in the middle east) drunk and laid for the first time in 6 months. #Murica
Being drunk at Chick-fil-A is a dystopian experience
we're tipping the strippers with chocolate coins.
Get over here and bring your drill!!! The strippers next door need help installing a stripper pole by their pool
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