I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
The walk of shame has never felt more glorious... I think it's the somberero
Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.
His idea of a compliment is: 'you're cuter than your friend. If you both wanted a 3way I'd do it,but I'd pay more attention to you.'
No no don't get confused. We do chemistry homework on Thursdays. We screw on Fridays. Other than that, Words With Friends is our only communication five days a week. We are NOT dating.
Her only article of clothing is an American Flag
Remember camping when you drank 36 beers to yourself in one day and puked in your tent? Ready for round 2?
No Bryan wants to get drunk, rub inappropriate dudes legs, talk about my vagina and send me pics of his boomerang dick. That's not how you watch basketball.
That's how he does EVERYTHING!
is it too much for me to say that i have a ziplock bag with ice in it in my underwear?
I wrote "fuck you meg" on my toaster strudel with the icing. I call it "passive aggressive breakfast"
You can't Tinder AND have him bring you icecream in the same night. It messes with your vagina.
Got an egg Mcmuffin combo, and put the hash brown in the sandwich. That level of hungover
He motorboated me, gave me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
ARE YOU DEAD? TEXT Y FOR YES OR N FOR NO.
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