I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
Bring more bourbon. Day drunk just hit another level.
Why do I have flashes of a dark shed in my memory?
Because we had sex in one.
I love my boobs, they're the only thing that supports me. They make me a solid 6.
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
We need to get her a baby shower present. And no, a blow up sex doll with her dead boyfriends picture stuck to it, is not appropriate.
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
She said pants are for pussies while spooning peanut butter onto her frosted flakes with a serving spoon. She's not even high yet.
I found a door knob in my purse this morning, I hope whoever it belonged to doesn't need it today.
hahahah
I have a corndog on my dresser and a trashcan of puke. Thanks for a great night!
Don't worry dude, I've created a sex logic bomb to stop that sort of thing.
YOU WAXED MY CAT YOU SICK FUCK
My "birthday sex" consisted of approximately 25 seconds of him going down on me in the shower.
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
Randomize
