Got a toothbrush?
Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
Lets go to the mall and pick up some fat chicks and take them out tonight so we can be the skinny friends
He wore homemade jorts on our first date. I'm not sure if I should leave now or embrace the white trash lust and marry him
We were playing hot potato with real potatoes at 3am
You know, I've never slept in a rug with anyone before you
So glad the long weekend is over so I can bring this bender to a merciful end.
He thought you were kidding about me peeing on my ex...and then I was like "that was one time"
Is using cherry lube as jam shameful or hilarious
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
I am serious when I say I think I broke a rib having sex with Kyle. It might be puncturing my lung. No lie. I might die today.
You just get me
I'm the wind beneath your wings, bitch
i want george washington to fuck me as hard as he can holy shit
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
we went to the skate park then back to her house for dinner, and somehow that ended with her making me blueberry pancakes at 2am
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