why did u let me go home with him last night?
u were determined it was a good idea
pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
operation have a gay friend backfired
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
Before he took my jeans off all he said was "no hard feelings from middle school right?"
You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
I took my vicodin with tequila. I can FEEL gravity...
When I came in she was screaming "boundaries!" at the cat because it was trying to eat her pizza rolls.
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
Just woke up from a dream where you lived in a gingerbread house on a snowy cliff by the sea. The dolphins were swimming away from a giant dust storm. You REALLY ought to smoke this before bed tonight.
I'd like to stay optimistic, but I have this nagging suspicion my penis is in for a disappointing holiday weekend.
A 3am FaceTime to go to IHOP is the closest thing to a bootycall that I'm getting
Just got home from work. I'm going to change into sweats for a while before I have to wear normal pants to the party like I promised.
Randomize
