is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
He wouldnt get hard, then started talking about his ex wife. I literally rolled over and started to cry
but the lizard people decide everything anyway
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
I have been sober for so long that I miss hangovers... what is happening to this summer?
Just pissed in my own closet. Had no idea adult dinner parties could he so awesome.
I sang again at the bar lastnight I don't think alanis morrset knew when she wrote you outta know that the drunk version was going to be go fuck yourself Josh and Chelsea. I love $2 wells.
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
You made me drive your car so you could give the dude from the parking lot a BJ in the back seat. Classy.
On a Thurs night I found myself drunk in a limo w 9 dudes on my way to a strip club. Once there I was handed $100 in ones and told "spend it." I need a husband. Or Jesus.
Funny how I'm trusting a magic 8 ball I found in the kids toy section to tell me about my sex life
Had sex in a blanket fort. How was your weekend?
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
So what happened at girls night? My roomate found me passed out locked out on the front steps of the house and it was raining. Yes low moment
I want you inside me. Finish your papers.
Randomize
