I just changed her number in my phone to "You Wouldn't If You were Sober"
I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
it was really awkward. it took him like like 2 minutes to realize who he was jacking off to. he stopped mid-stroke. such a small small world
i told you not to try chat roulette
I definitely recall eating shredded cheese out of the bag while you were wearing that apron.
drunk enough to drink jager bombs out of a bowl on the kitchen floor.
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
and ive been naked for the greater part of the evening. alone, drunk, and naked. i think that is how all great interventions start.
Well obviously when I get drunk my intelligence level surpasses yours and that's why you can't understand me.
Come over. I've made 2 dinners and so many cocktails. I'm a 50's housewife with no family.
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
How does one get out of sexting without being rude? I'm trying to watch Downtown Abbey
and then after the older sorority girl asked me his name she said "he gave me the rest of his mcdonalds and I decided to go home with him. it was the best that I could hope for my night"
We're not ready for visitors right now.
wtf? who's we?
The Royal We: Me, My Vag, and I.
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
Randomize
