Got separated, got a half bj, got dropped off in random part of the city, don't tell anyone
I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
theyre just this beautiful family of functioning alcoholics. i want them to adopt me.
You would only drink if the space jam soundtrack was playing, you thought it was hilarious that before every shot you said "y'all ready for this".
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
As soon as he told me I had a 'pretty laugh' I knew I'd be putting out more than I had originally planned.
This is a dangerous game of "whose life is more pathetic".
a price tag just fell out of my vag. i guess its worth $13.99...
oh my god. the driver of our party bus just said "no drugs unless you're sharin," my confidence in him is not high at the moment
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
Give me a second. I'm doing my best but I'm drunk so for some reason fitting both my boobs in the pic is just incredibly difficult. They aren't THAT big. I'm just being retarded.
I'm wearing the monkey suit out tonight. I hope you're ok with it leaving the bedroom
I know I've never told you this before.. but Gyro sauce makes everything okay.
I didn't have time to wash my hair yesterday. Ended up spraying some Febreeze on it.
It was probably bad to sleep with someone just to pet his dog right?
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