Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
hey I'm just gonna fall asleep in the bathroom at the library call me when you're done with class
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
These fall allergies are really hindering my cocaine habit.
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
Those drunk pictures you took of me? My mom is showing those to my grandparents.
He drinks vodka like healthy people drink water and I wanted to have his adopted gay babies. That's all. I'm going to go find him and potentially propose.
My bank account got hacked so he showed up with a 6 pack wearing a superman cape to cheer me up and you question why I love him?
A stranger came up to me, pointed at my drink and asked what it tasted like and proceeded to chug half of it and then walked away.
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
How do you explain to your mom that you let your friend stab you in the leg while drunk and high on coke?
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
My "birthday sex" consisted of approximately 25 seconds of him going down on me in the shower.
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
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