He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
Im telling you now. Hang out with winning football players and you get whatever the hell you want. Sorry to wake you. But its important knowledge.
He was putting purell on my boobs saying "they need to be clean for later." He hadn't had a drink all night
so i used to love airports for the escalators... now its the bars... then the escalators after the bars
she was stuffing dove chocolates in my mouth while giving me a blow job. GOD I LOVE VALENTINES DAY
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
yeah but think of how much more hungover we'd be if we didn't steal those cookies
when i got home she was standing in my front yard not wearing a shirt and halfway crying/ halfway laughing
DID YOU DO SOMETHING WITH THE DEAD ROACH IN THE KITCHEN? OR DID IT LAZARUS?
You woke up butt naked, peed yourself said something about jumbo shrimp, and passed back out 10 seconds ltr..
I'll be home soonish I need 4th of July sex, it's the American thing to do.
Well if I can't snuggle you, I might as well snuggle a stranger's cat.
COME TO THE TOP OF THE MOUNTAIN AND I WILL GIVE YOU MY SAGE ADVICE.
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
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