Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
I just left the house and 2 chicks are in the kitchen making breakfast. Might want to get up.
I'm up, no shirt, and staring at a breakfast casserole. Who are these girls?
the level of his annoyance + every insult he makes = the closer I am to telling him im fucking his ex
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
No. I want him to marry me so we can spend our lives together. I also want a to-scale model of his genitals to mount above my fireplace
you puked on the porch, i can see your jacket on the floor next to your underwear. i know your home, unchain the door, you're the worst roommate ever.
I love you. Happy valentines. Satin Patricks dayyyyyyyyyy. Alreadythrew up. Geeeeerait.
ders ninda duuude pooring goden shots ov glory. I see em an i dont but there hear.
are you attempting voice recognition while drunk again?
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
I just turned down a booty call because I'm having a Star Wars movie marathon
You were holding onto her boobs like you were adrift at sea and they were the only flotation devices
listen i get youre a daddy dom but that doesnt give you a pass to make dad jokes
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
Not only is he funny, he had a REALLY big dick
He's old enough to be your father!
REALLY. BIG. DICK.
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